The number of students admitted to school is making its way up. Yeah, I still have a job for the next year.
Wonder when will my career take off ?
Monday, December 29, 2003
There is a saying that goes somewhere along the line of, "Lightning never strikes twice in the same place". That's BS. In my case, a weird sense of deja vu occurred yesterday.
Macmek fell.
Although I didn't find the corpse, traces of fresh blood was found directly at the foot of the flat. Putting 2 and 2 together, we came to that conclusion. She has never been missing for so long. Usually, when my ma wakes up and put fresh biscuits, she would rush out from where ever she was to follow her mummy around.
I've been in this position before but the pain always cuts deep every single time. And why does it always have to be the sweet ones who goes first ?
Just the other day, my ma commented that if she passed on, Macmek would not be able to cope with the loss as compared to the others. Who's to know, she's the one who goes first ?
The last time I saw her alive was pre-dawn when I went to use the toilet. She was just sitting by the laundry basket, looking out of the kitchen window. I asked her, why she was up so early, but she didn't make any indications that she heard me. Usually, she would be asking me to open my ma's bedroom door so that she can sleep in. I didn't think there was anything odd about it. When I woke up at 9, I thought I saw her sitting in the living room chair, waiting for my ma to wake up. I then switched on the tv and left my room door ajar.
10 mins to 10, my ma came by and closed the door. A while later she asked if Macmek was in my room. And I said no. We searched everywhere in the house, but she didn't appear. That's when Ma suspected something was wrong. We looked out the windows but we didn't see anything unlike the time with Ayang.
But I have that bad feeling that won't go away. So anyway, I made a trip downstairs and that's when it was confirmed.
Such a sweet, happy soul, gone. I didn't even get to kiss her goodbye. Body dumped in the bin like any other rubbish. I guess I needed to see whatever to reconcile the fact that she is indeed gone.
Macmek fell.
Although I didn't find the corpse, traces of fresh blood was found directly at the foot of the flat. Putting 2 and 2 together, we came to that conclusion. She has never been missing for so long. Usually, when my ma wakes up and put fresh biscuits, she would rush out from where ever she was to follow her mummy around.
I've been in this position before but the pain always cuts deep every single time. And why does it always have to be the sweet ones who goes first ?
Just the other day, my ma commented that if she passed on, Macmek would not be able to cope with the loss as compared to the others. Who's to know, she's the one who goes first ?
The last time I saw her alive was pre-dawn when I went to use the toilet. She was just sitting by the laundry basket, looking out of the kitchen window. I asked her, why she was up so early, but she didn't make any indications that she heard me. Usually, she would be asking me to open my ma's bedroom door so that she can sleep in. I didn't think there was anything odd about it. When I woke up at 9, I thought I saw her sitting in the living room chair, waiting for my ma to wake up. I then switched on the tv and left my room door ajar.
10 mins to 10, my ma came by and closed the door. A while later she asked if Macmek was in my room. And I said no. We searched everywhere in the house, but she didn't appear. That's when Ma suspected something was wrong. We looked out the windows but we didn't see anything unlike the time with Ayang.
But I have that bad feeling that won't go away. So anyway, I made a trip downstairs and that's when it was confirmed.
Such a sweet, happy soul, gone. I didn't even get to kiss her goodbye. Body dumped in the bin like any other rubbish. I guess I needed to see whatever to reconcile the fact that she is indeed gone.
Saturday, December 27, 2003
Hey people.
Found out that I don't have to hand in any assignments next week. All thanks to Kavitha. Such a sweetheart. Hehe ... Sorry if I'd panicked you last evening ! All the same, no time to slack off. I don't wanna panic again, come the week of assignment due dates ! *phew*
My ma's going to JB today. To attend a relative's wedding. Not her side of the family but my dad's and dad's not even accompanying her ! He had just came back from his night shift so most prolly, he'd be home sleeping it off. Or not. Anyway, I had to break a movie date with Laine. I really feel terrible, dear. I wish I can get my sis to house sit the cats but she practically ignored my cry for help. *sheesh* That's blood sisters for you !
House sit my cats ? Well, yeah, dad might let them go. As in put them back in the void deck. I won't be able to handle that trauma. So just for my ma, I am forsaking my social life, yet again. On the other hand, I can get to do my research on my assignments. Yeah, yeah .... I keep harping on them, but really, you guys can't imagine how freaked out I am by the idea of school. Super freaked out !
Found out that I don't have to hand in any assignments next week. All thanks to Kavitha. Such a sweetheart. Hehe ... Sorry if I'd panicked you last evening ! All the same, no time to slack off. I don't wanna panic again, come the week of assignment due dates ! *phew*
My ma's going to JB today. To attend a relative's wedding. Not her side of the family but my dad's and dad's not even accompanying her ! He had just came back from his night shift so most prolly, he'd be home sleeping it off. Or not. Anyway, I had to break a movie date with Laine. I really feel terrible, dear. I wish I can get my sis to house sit the cats but she practically ignored my cry for help. *sheesh* That's blood sisters for you !
House sit my cats ? Well, yeah, dad might let them go. As in put them back in the void deck. I won't be able to handle that trauma. So just for my ma, I am forsaking my social life, yet again. On the other hand, I can get to do my research on my assignments. Yeah, yeah .... I keep harping on them, but really, you guys can't imagine how freaked out I am by the idea of school. Super freaked out !
Friday, December 26, 2003
Came by earlier today. I wanted to post on the movies I wanna watch. Then I figured, what a lame-o topic. So now I am fresh out of ideas.
Just finished lunch. It was good. I had chicken in soya sauce, with cabbage mixed veg and to top off, curry gravy. It was good ! *rubs tummy*
Hey people, I have no plans for the weekend. Wanna meet up or something ? I know, I know .... kinda last minute but if you can squeeze me in somewhere. Anybody ? Somebody ?
Oh, well .... forget it. I am staying home to get started on my assignments. 3 weeks back to back dues. Have fun you guys. At least for those who are spending time out. For those like me, hmmmm .... Have fun anyways !
Just finished lunch. It was good. I had chicken in soya sauce, with cabbage mixed veg and to top off, curry gravy. It was good ! *rubs tummy*
Hey people, I have no plans for the weekend. Wanna meet up or something ? I know, I know .... kinda last minute but if you can squeeze me in somewhere. Anybody ? Somebody ?
Oh, well .... forget it. I am staying home to get started on my assignments. 3 weeks back to back dues. Have fun you guys. At least for those who are spending time out. For those like me, hmmmm .... Have fun anyways !
Thursday, December 25, 2003
My future cell
The Motorola A760
Fact Sheet
See the world through rainbow-colored glasses with the Motorola A760, bringing objects to life in vibrant, living color. Featuring a color touch screen that supports up to 65,000 colors, the model A760 is a Picasso in your palm. Combining a PC, PDA, camera, MP3 player and speakerphone with advanced messaging, instant Internet access and Bluetooth™ wireless technology in a single device, the Motorola A760 is a jack-of-all-trades poised to meet your communications and entertainment needs. And, the model A760 is ideal for execs on the move with secure and instant access to corporate e-mail and database applications. Everyone loves a multi-tasker.
I am so sold.
Being a public holiday and all, I'm gonna divulge a little background tale of yours truly. Bear with me.
Moniker ? black_sherbet@wtf.com (well ... duh !)
Real moniker ..... Oh .... ! I go by Helena, pretty much most of the time.
Favourite Track ? Gosh .... Way too many ! But I would say "Sunrise" by Simply Red. Simple really, the song almost always makes me feel hot and sexy even at my mostest dowdy moments !
Favourite thing to do ? This is a no brainner. Read. Anytime, anywhere, anything.
Most embarrassing moment ? I wish I can say I remember, but as with all the nasty bits in you life, you conveniently forget them !
Sunshine, snow or rain ? Rain. Definitely. Makes me get in touch with my emotional side.
Favourite shades ? Lilac. I am only slightly sexually repressed/deprived.
Favourite item ? My "smelly" pillow. It's comforting. Absolutely !
Cartoons / Kiddie Shows ? Hi-5 ! Come on, 1, 2, 3, 4, Hi-5 ....
Finally, love of your life ? At this moment ? My mother and my 5 kucing setan. Sorry to disappoint all of you, especially those expecting a scandalous answer. *winks*
Happy Holidays y'all !!!!!
~xxxxx~
Moniker ? black_sherbet@wtf.com (well ... duh !)
Real moniker ..... Oh .... ! I go by Helena, pretty much most of the time.
Favourite Track ? Gosh .... Way too many ! But I would say "Sunrise" by Simply Red. Simple really, the song almost always makes me feel hot and sexy even at my mostest dowdy moments !
Favourite thing to do ? This is a no brainner. Read. Anytime, anywhere, anything.
Most embarrassing moment ? I wish I can say I remember, but as with all the nasty bits in you life, you conveniently forget them !
Sunshine, snow or rain ? Rain. Definitely. Makes me get in touch with my emotional side.
Favourite shades ? Lilac. I am only slightly sexually repressed/deprived.
Favourite item ? My "smelly" pillow. It's comforting. Absolutely !
Cartoons / Kiddie Shows ? Hi-5 ! Come on, 1, 2, 3, 4, Hi-5 ....
Finally, love of your life ? At this moment ? My mother and my 5 kucing setan. Sorry to disappoint all of you, especially those expecting a scandalous answer. *winks*
Happy Holidays y'all !!!!!
~xxxxx~
Wednesday, December 24, 2003
As I've told my 2 bestest friends (whom I'm chatting with right now on MSN) in the whole wide world (www, geddit ?), I am in serious need of a new machine. Machine being a PC. Yeah, I need it so much, my course passing marks depends on it. Like all of it !!!!!
My browser windows kept hanging in time, space and continuum every 5 minutes after I opened them. How the fark am I supposed to do my farking research for my farking assignments due farking next week ????
*breathes in and out slowly*
I am so farking bursting a blood vessel ! And then, where will I be ? Farking back to my first Patho assignment, that's where. Farking H - E - L - L !!!!
*breathes in and out slowly, at a faster rate*
I am so farking failing my course. I knew it ! My 2K odd bucks will finally say its goodbyes from the drainage hole. I am so farken screwed. So very screwed. F - A - R - K !!!!!!!!!
*screws breathing slowly*
People. Please do pray for me. My time is near. To say goodbye. To something I held close for 4 (farken) years. My (farken) PC is going to where all (farken) PCs go to. Some place better than in my (farken) room.
*AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!*
*tears out hair*
My browser windows kept hanging in time, space and continuum every 5 minutes after I opened them. How the fark am I supposed to do my farking research for my farking assignments due farking next week ????
*breathes in and out slowly*
I am so farking bursting a blood vessel ! And then, where will I be ? Farking back to my first Patho assignment, that's where. Farking H - E - L - L !!!!
*breathes in and out slowly, at a faster rate*
I am so farking failing my course. I knew it ! My 2K odd bucks will finally say its goodbyes from the drainage hole. I am so farken screwed. So very screwed. F - A - R - K !!!!!!!!!
*screws breathing slowly*
People. Please do pray for me. My time is near. To say goodbye. To something I held close for 4 (farken) years. My (farken) PC is going to where all (farken) PCs go to. Some place better than in my (farken) room.
*AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!*
*tears out hair*
Tuesday, December 23, 2003
I simply love sharpened pencils. And I mean this literally. Yesterday, I brought my new, big red sharpener to work because of all the unsharpened pencils lying around on my table. I got to work and sharpened 8 or 9 pencils. Making them all sharp and pointy. I smelled the shavings ....... ummmmm ....... wood scent. I love it !
Point of this post ?
Just one of my little quirks.
Point of this post ?
Just one of my little quirks.
Saturday, December 20, 2003
Pissed off is a mild term to describe what I was feeling yesterday. It was such a hurtful experience to be let down by the very people you think you can trust. That is just at work. Home front, that's another area that got me cheesed off. My life seemed to be in a f***ed up mess at this mo. *I wanna get away I wanna fly away yeah yeah* Yeah, right .....
Accompanied Eileen to WestMall yesterday. She wanted to trade in her current cellphone to the new Sony Ericsson. Was it T610 ? Anyway, when we left work, we sorta like sneaked out coz official knock off time is 5.30 pm. But yesterday, we "siamed" at 5.15pm. Took a long circuitous route to the staircase to avoid Jessica sitting at the lift lobby and then guess who saw us sneaked out ? The very person we tried to avoid ! Har .... a pair of snoops are we !!!
The weather threatened to rain but we couldn't care less so we quickly walked to the bus stop. Saw the bus we wanted to take approaching the traffic light but we still maintained our current speed. Reached the bus stop together (bus and us). Along the way, it poured ! Rather heavily to boot ! We were just commenting we should have brought the brollies but as soon as we reached out destination the rain stopped. Thinking it was our lucky evening, we made our way to the M1 shop. Queue wasn't as long as the weekend (according to Eileen), so another lucky sign, we thought. She queued while I went browsing the mall. Found the community library there and decided to spend the rest of my waiting time there.
Was looking through my 3rd book when I received a text from Eileen. Made my way back to the shop. Waited another 10 mins or so before Eileen was called. Sat down and went about the business. She asked for the red T610 but sold out ! The nice man (NM) said he will try the other M1 shops. After searching on the computer system, he said there is a last red T610 somewhere. Said he will try giving them a ring. So we sat down and waited for the NM and Eileen chose a number. After waiting for some time, NM came back and said that all the red phones are gone. :((( So asked if she could get the display phone but NM said it's a dummy (duh !?!). So she decided to have a look at the other 2 colcours. Discussed about which colour she wanted (blue or silver), I'd go for the blue because I'm biased. She said she preferred the silver but after some time deliberating, she decided for the blue. Then she handed over her current phone and the NM fiddled with it. We were still trying to see the pros and cons of the blue. Looked slimmer, said Eileen. I said it was just an optical illusion. So anyway, the NM interrupted our debate and asked Eileen for the security code of her phone. She said she's not sure, try the default. NM said he tried but cannot crack. Eileen tried different combi, still couldn't crack it. Even called her hubby, zilch. Zero. Nada.
So we left the shop without me seeing E's new phone ! The disappointment. Thought I could coerced her to take the very first photo from the phone of my face. Just not meant to buy the phone. Arrgghhh .... Poor dear !
Accompanied Eileen to WestMall yesterday. She wanted to trade in her current cellphone to the new Sony Ericsson. Was it T610 ? Anyway, when we left work, we sorta like sneaked out coz official knock off time is 5.30 pm. But yesterday, we "siamed" at 5.15pm. Took a long circuitous route to the staircase to avoid Jessica sitting at the lift lobby and then guess who saw us sneaked out ? The very person we tried to avoid ! Har .... a pair of snoops are we !!!
The weather threatened to rain but we couldn't care less so we quickly walked to the bus stop. Saw the bus we wanted to take approaching the traffic light but we still maintained our current speed. Reached the bus stop together (bus and us). Along the way, it poured ! Rather heavily to boot ! We were just commenting we should have brought the brollies but as soon as we reached out destination the rain stopped. Thinking it was our lucky evening, we made our way to the M1 shop. Queue wasn't as long as the weekend (according to Eileen), so another lucky sign, we thought. She queued while I went browsing the mall. Found the community library there and decided to spend the rest of my waiting time there.
Was looking through my 3rd book when I received a text from Eileen. Made my way back to the shop. Waited another 10 mins or so before Eileen was called. Sat down and went about the business. She asked for the red T610 but sold out ! The nice man (NM) said he will try the other M1 shops. After searching on the computer system, he said there is a last red T610 somewhere. Said he will try giving them a ring. So we sat down and waited for the NM and Eileen chose a number. After waiting for some time, NM came back and said that all the red phones are gone. :((( So asked if she could get the display phone but NM said it's a dummy (duh !?!). So she decided to have a look at the other 2 colcours. Discussed about which colour she wanted (blue or silver), I'd go for the blue because I'm biased. She said she preferred the silver but after some time deliberating, she decided for the blue. Then she handed over her current phone and the NM fiddled with it. We were still trying to see the pros and cons of the blue. Looked slimmer, said Eileen. I said it was just an optical illusion. So anyway, the NM interrupted our debate and asked Eileen for the security code of her phone. She said she's not sure, try the default. NM said he tried but cannot crack. Eileen tried different combi, still couldn't crack it. Even called her hubby, zilch. Zero. Nada.
So we left the shop without me seeing E's new phone ! The disappointment. Thought I could coerced her to take the very first photo from the phone of my face. Just not meant to buy the phone. Arrgghhh .... Poor dear !
Friday, December 19, 2003
Mass circumcision for racial harmony ?
KUALA LUMPUR - Given the growing popularity of circumcision among non-Muslim minorities, Malaysia is considering using mass circumcision ceremonies to promote racial harmony.
Cicumcision is a rite of passage for young Muslim boys, while for minority groups, it's seen as a good hygiene practice.
Dr Adbul Hamid Othman, the prime minister's religious adviser, has suggested that the ritual can bring Malaysians together and he wants to see a nationwide circumcision ceremony organised.
In Malaysia it is common for the ceremony to become an event with dozens, or even hundreds of boys being circumcised together, BBC Online reported yesterday.
The governement has been exploring ways of stopping the different groups from drifting apart, including the introduction of a national service scheme which begins in February.
Sounds like a plausible idea. Do you think there will be any takers for this mass circumcision ? No, do you even think this (hair-brain) idea would even take off ?????
Cicumcision is a rite of passage for young Muslim boys, while for minority groups, it's seen as a good hygiene practice.
Dr Adbul Hamid Othman, the prime minister's religious adviser, has suggested that the ritual can bring Malaysians together and he wants to see a nationwide circumcision ceremony organised.
In Malaysia it is common for the ceremony to become an event with dozens, or even hundreds of boys being circumcised together, BBC Online reported yesterday.
The governement has been exploring ways of stopping the different groups from drifting apart, including the introduction of a national service scheme which begins in February.
Sounds like a plausible idea. Do you think there will be any takers for this mass circumcision ? No, do you even think this (hair-brain) idea would even take off ?????
I suppose I can say I saw this coming. I can even claim with a degree of certainty that I had expected it to turn out this way. I guess, I would be disappointed IF it didn't culminate to this event.
Today's post : I am just gonna write and ramble on how E V I L one's work place can get.
I feel upset, a little angry and very much like rejected goods. Defective item, unusable at all. Dumped like a bag of hot shit. Pardon me if you find my language coarse. I can't be fucking bothered to fucking censor it today. So fucking sorry.
Oh, someone who has outlive his usefulness should be fucking shot. Fucking right ! I felt like that. Like I have been sucked dried of all use and spat out. Kinda like eating sugarcane. Bite, chew, suck, spat.
I am so gonna fucking stay in my room and sulk. Don't bother with the soothing words. I feel fucking used. Fuck them all !
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKASS !
Today's post : I am just gonna write and ramble on how E V I L one's work place can get.
I feel upset, a little angry and very much like rejected goods. Defective item, unusable at all. Dumped like a bag of hot shit. Pardon me if you find my language coarse. I can't be fucking bothered to fucking censor it today. So fucking sorry.
Oh, someone who has outlive his usefulness should be fucking shot. Fucking right ! I felt like that. Like I have been sucked dried of all use and spat out. Kinda like eating sugarcane. Bite, chew, suck, spat.
I am so gonna fucking stay in my room and sulk. Don't bother with the soothing words. I feel fucking used. Fuck them all !
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKASS !
Thursday, December 18, 2003
Kisses and caresses ....
You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves
your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling
he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss
that never lessens and always blows your
partner away like the first time.
What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Click on this link to read what has been churning out by the people over in NUS.
Oh btw, if you have the chance, try to watch Sunshine. Arts Central screened it last night but I only caught it after an hour or so after the movie started. Movie was 3 hours long. And sad to say, I didn't manage to watch until the end (had to sleep, need to work today). Damn good movie, but then, I'm biased. It's a Ralph Fiennes vehicle and I must say, he's a damn good actor (aside from the biasness, it's the truth) ! And I would say he's been both the victim and torturer in movies involving the second world war. He was the victim in this movie and was the aggressor in Schindler's List. Which is by the way, a really excellent movie !
Oh btw, if you have the chance, try to watch Sunshine. Arts Central screened it last night but I only caught it after an hour or so after the movie started. Movie was 3 hours long. And sad to say, I didn't manage to watch until the end (had to sleep, need to work today). Damn good movie, but then, I'm biased. It's a Ralph Fiennes vehicle and I must say, he's a damn good actor (aside from the biasness, it's the truth) ! And I would say he's been both the victim and torturer in movies involving the second world war. He was the victim in this movie and was the aggressor in Schindler's List. Which is by the way, a really excellent movie !
Wednesday, December 17, 2003
Save A Prayer ~ Duran Duran
Nope, I'm not gonna copy the lyrics of the above song.
If you are a true blue Gold 90.5 FM fan, chances are, you would have heard my singing for the above song at the 9.30 am Karaoke Classic hour. Har har .... For those of you secretly sniggering at my croaky voice, imagine the surprise if you are put on the spot. Well, yeah I'd expected the singing bit. What I didn't expect was my SMS was picked for the chosen song of the hour. Man, what a surprise ! Nice surprise, though.
Hope nothing happens later to screw up my day. Considering the fact that I got a "marriage proposal" this morning ! Thanks Hamish for that spurt of encouragement ! Hehe ....
If you are a true blue Gold 90.5 FM fan, chances are, you would have heard my singing for the above song at the 9.30 am Karaoke Classic hour. Har har .... For those of you secretly sniggering at my croaky voice, imagine the surprise if you are put on the spot. Well, yeah I'd expected the singing bit. What I didn't expect was my SMS was picked for the chosen song of the hour. Man, what a surprise ! Nice surprise, though.
Hope nothing happens later to screw up my day. Considering the fact that I got a "marriage proposal" this morning ! Thanks Hamish for that spurt of encouragement ! Hehe ....
Tuesday, December 16, 2003
Hey people, finally Shaheeda has decided to own her own weblog. Just surf by here. Go by and make her write !
Monday, December 15, 2003
Shaheeda's online now. Poor dear took day off because her throat's getting some nasties that can't be shaken off easily. Hehe .... I was coughing my lungs out just yesterday.
I'm hungry. Was too sleepy to get food in the morning so have to tie up the stomach, curb the appetite and all that crap. But seriously, I need to lose weight (or water as some people might put it succinctly !). I am at my worst today. I looked like a bag lady. Gosh, some days are better without the things called mirrors. I just want to lay my head and drift off to slumberland.
*yawnz*
Seriously. I want to go to bed. I mean N O W !
I'm hungry. Was too sleepy to get food in the morning so have to tie up the stomach, curb the appetite and all that crap. But seriously, I need to lose weight (or water as some people might put it succinctly !). I am at my worst today. I looked like a bag lady. Gosh, some days are better without the things called mirrors. I just want to lay my head and drift off to slumberland.
*yawnz*
Seriously. I want to go to bed. I mean N O W !
As you can see, my second entry and the it's only half way through Manic Monday.
Yupz, too much time, too little motivation. Checked my bank balance earlier. Yupz, bonus and salary came in early. Damn, how do I keep my paws off all those sweet $$$ ???
Given the state of my mind at the moment, I just want to spend, spend, spend ! *lolz*
So anyway, I need ideas. I need help to find me a nice gift for the office gift exchange for under $ 10. Slightly more is fine. And no, please don't suggest The Body Shop's gift. I think that's the most convenient gift for unimaginative, possibly forced to celebrate this occasion individual. Some flair, people. And of course a little originality and authenticity.
Yupz, too much time, too little motivation. Checked my bank balance earlier. Yupz, bonus and salary came in early. Damn, how do I keep my paws off all those sweet $$$ ???
Given the state of my mind at the moment, I just want to spend, spend, spend ! *lolz*
So anyway, I need ideas. I need help to find me a nice gift for the office gift exchange for under $ 10. Slightly more is fine. And no, please don't suggest The Body Shop's gift. I think that's the most convenient gift for unimaginative, possibly forced to celebrate this occasion individual. Some flair, people. And of course a little originality and authenticity.
MASTERMIND
(Submissive Introvert Abstract Thinker )
Helena
Like just 8% of the population you are a MASTERMIND (SIAT). You can be silent and withdrawn, but behind your reserved exterior lies an active mind that allows you to analyze situations and come up with creative, unexpected solutions. Normal people call this "scheming." Don't learn German.
Anyway, your sense of style and originality are your strengths, and people will respect your judgment once they get to know you. If you learn to be a little more personable, you could be a great leader--you've definitely got the "vision" thing down. Just make sure all the plotting you do behind those eyes of yours is healthy.
Famous masterminds in television: Dr. Claw, The Scarecrow and Mrs. King, Montgomery Burns.
Take the test.
(Submissive Introvert Abstract Thinker )
Helena
Like just 8% of the population you are a MASTERMIND (SIAT). You can be silent and withdrawn, but behind your reserved exterior lies an active mind that allows you to analyze situations and come up with creative, unexpected solutions. Normal people call this "scheming." Don't learn German.
Anyway, your sense of style and originality are your strengths, and people will respect your judgment once they get to know you. If you learn to be a little more personable, you could be a great leader--you've definitely got the "vision" thing down. Just make sure all the plotting you do behind those eyes of yours is healthy.
Famous masterminds in television: Dr. Claw, The Scarecrow and Mrs. King, Montgomery Burns.
Take the test.
Sunday, December 14, 2003
I LOVE LOVE ACTUALLY !!!!!
The movie makes me feel all gooey and sappy inside ! I'd even want my non-existant phantom lover "boyfriend" !!!!
Went to watch the movie with Elaine, Fie and Sha. We basically spent the better part of the afternoon, evening and night together. I really miss my secondary school days. Those days when you can still dream the impossible. Trudging down a road you are unsure of the destination. The mistakes you made were so easily forgivable. I want those days back !!!
I realised how much we think (assume) we know someone when in actuality we know nothing of them at all. Why are we all so afraid to let people in ? Why do we ever mask our true feelings and face each day with a facade ? Why ? Why ?
Why can't we all love and be loved ????
*sighs*
Went to watch the movie with Elaine, Fie and Sha. We basically spent the better part of the afternoon, evening and night together. I really miss my secondary school days. Those days when you can still dream the impossible. Trudging down a road you are unsure of the destination. The mistakes you made were so easily forgivable. I want those days back !!!
I realised how much we think (assume) we know someone when in actuality we know nothing of them at all. Why are we all so afraid to let people in ? Why do we ever mask our true feelings and face each day with a facade ? Why ? Why ?
Why can't we all love and be loved ????
*sighs*
Saturday, December 13, 2003
You guys are gonna get this news first hand.
Samuel dear is going to be featured on the Guiness Book of World Records. His main act (of stupidity ?) is making the loudest tongue clicking sound. Okay you guys be the judge.
So Samuel, don't say I don't think of gratitude, okay. I am taking out a post on your exploits in capital L.
Oh, yeah, if you want the publicity for your upcoming book, just tell me. I'll take out another post specially for your new book. Autograph signing dates can also be included in ! It's free of charge (umm ... we'll negotiate that.) !
Samuel dear is going to be featured on the Guiness Book of World Records. His main act (of stupidity ?) is making the loudest tongue clicking sound. Okay you guys be the judge.
So Samuel, don't say I don't think of gratitude, okay. I am taking out a post on your exploits in capital L.
Oh, yeah, if you want the publicity for your upcoming book, just tell me. I'll take out another post specially for your new book. Autograph signing dates can also be included in ! It's free of charge (umm ... we'll negotiate that.) !
Friday, December 12, 2003
I wish I can write longer today. You know another BS session for the people out there but at this very moment in time, I am rushing to complete my Patho assignment. It's a bitch, but then I have no one else to blame but myself for procrastination. Har ..... Serves me right, eh ?
So anyway, I am well. For people who were wishing me well, thanks so much for your kind prayers and umm ... wishes. For those who wish me death, hah .... ! Too damn bad you didn't get your wish (and prayers) come true ! Hah ... !
So anyway, I am well. For people who were wishing me well, thanks so much for your kind prayers and umm ... wishes. For those who wish me death, hah .... ! Too damn bad you didn't get your wish (and prayers) come true ! Hah ... !
Thursday, December 11, 2003
I suspect I might be pregnant.
I was puking my guts out just. You know that bit of spasm when you know you have nothing else in the tummy to empty. Yup. Got that and more. I didn't know how it happened though. The puking bit of course. I was fine this morning. You know really psyched out to be at work so that I can go back early today. Really.
Then around 10-ish, received a popup message (or call ?? Sheesh ... I can't remember !) from Eileen saying that Suma is not in and that there weren't anyone in the Library. I said I was okay about going up to the Library (giving me a chance to complete my assignment). So before I left my cosy, cosy prep room, I ate a slice of Gardenia (so good, you can even eat it on its own !). Brought my stuff upstairs and settled down to complete the task. After a few lines (of copying and pasting), I started to feel light headed and nauseated. I thought it was just because my spectacles were a little senget (my niece sat on my face. I was wearing my glasses then). So I took it off and decided to rest my head. Leaned back on the seat and I started to feel really awful.
Eileen came up then to chit chat. Told her I was overcame with sudden light headedness. She smiled that knowing smile. I said, "Har, I'm joining your club." She looked taken aback so I quickly said, "The nauseousness bit of it." She smiled. After a few minutes (during which I told her there is a security cam facing our direction. I was sitting back on the chair with my bare feet on an opposite chair, getting really comfy) when she decided to siam for a bit. When she left I went back to the counter and lay my head down. I got that full feeling and so decided to make my way to the loo. Har too late. I regurgitate right in front of the counter. Luckily there was no one to witness my "drama".
Quickly I went to the loo and the rest came up. Man, what a head rush.
Puked a couple more times. Once more in the Library loo and the other in my prep room. Arrgghh ....
I feel so weak. My tummy feels weak. I can't even eat the Gardenia (so good, you can even eat it on its own !) I brought for lunch. Made me a mug of Milo and I'm not even half way through it. Although the Chinese pear I just ate seemed to be holding on. Eileen suggested that I take something sour in, so I had a piece of Orange Peel. I don't know how all of them are holding on. I might need to empty out the tummy again. Shoot. I can't swivel my head without feeling faint. Must. Turn. My. Whole. Body. To. Look. At. The. Sides.
On the other hand, naah ...
I can't be pregnant. 1) I'm at that time of the month, and 2) My "boyfriend" is definitely not a phantom lover !
Then around 10-ish, received a popup message (or call ?? Sheesh ... I can't remember !) from Eileen saying that Suma is not in and that there weren't anyone in the Library. I said I was okay about going up to the Library (giving me a chance to complete my assignment). So before I left my cosy, cosy prep room, I ate a slice of Gardenia (so good, you can even eat it on its own !). Brought my stuff upstairs and settled down to complete the task. After a few lines (of copying and pasting), I started to feel light headed and nauseated. I thought it was just because my spectacles were a little senget (my niece sat on my face. I was wearing my glasses then). So I took it off and decided to rest my head. Leaned back on the seat and I started to feel really awful.
Eileen came up then to chit chat. Told her I was overcame with sudden light headedness. She smiled that knowing smile. I said, "Har, I'm joining your club." She looked taken aback so I quickly said, "The nauseousness bit of it." She smiled. After a few minutes (during which I told her there is a security cam facing our direction. I was sitting back on the chair with my bare feet on an opposite chair, getting really comfy) when she decided to siam for a bit. When she left I went back to the counter and lay my head down. I got that full feeling and so decided to make my way to the loo. Har too late. I regurgitate right in front of the counter. Luckily there was no one to witness my "drama".
Quickly I went to the loo and the rest came up. Man, what a head rush.
Puked a couple more times. Once more in the Library loo and the other in my prep room. Arrgghh ....
I feel so weak. My tummy feels weak. I can't even eat the Gardenia (so good, you can even eat it on its own !) I brought for lunch. Made me a mug of Milo and I'm not even half way through it. Although the Chinese pear I just ate seemed to be holding on. Eileen suggested that I take something sour in, so I had a piece of Orange Peel. I don't know how all of them are holding on. I might need to empty out the tummy again. Shoot. I can't swivel my head without feeling faint. Must. Turn. My. Whole. Body. To. Look. At. The. Sides.
On the other hand, naah ...
I can't be pregnant. 1) I'm at that time of the month, and 2) My "boyfriend" is definitely not a phantom lover !
Wednesday, December 10, 2003
I think I have a sick fascination with this song, Shout by Tears For Fears. I keep putting it on repeat mode on my discman. I like how the heavy synthesised beats ring in my ears. And I would usually blast the song at full volume. Another song that keeps giving me this kinda emotional, sad feeling is Save A Prayer by Duran Duran (coming to concert in Singapore !). The starting bit, where there was some kinda flutey beat is fantastic. Simply fanstatic. I don't really know how to describe it. You have to listen to it to know exactly. It's a sad song played in a fast tune.
I think this stems from the fact that these are like totally 80s tracks and I do admit that I have a strange affinity for that era. Yup, strange and weird.
*sighs*
I think this stems from the fact that these are like totally 80s tracks and I do admit that I have a strange affinity for that era. Yup, strange and weird.
*sighs*
Tuesday, December 09, 2003
Tuesday, December 02, 2003
One Day I'll Fly Away ~ Shirley Bassey
I may get along, when love is gone
Still you made your mark, here in my heart
One day I'll fly away
Leave your love to yesterday
What more can your love do for me?
When will love be through with me?
I followed the night
Can't stand the light
When will I begin
My life again
One day I'll fly away
Leave your love to yesterday
What more can your love do for me?
When will love be through with me?
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day that dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
Leave your love to yesterday
What more can your love do for me?
When will love be through with me?
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day that dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
(Fly away)
Still you made your mark, here in my heart
One day I'll fly away
Leave your love to yesterday
What more can your love do for me?
When will love be through with me?
I followed the night
Can't stand the light
When will I begin
My life again
One day I'll fly away
Leave your love to yesterday
What more can your love do for me?
When will love be through with me?
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day that dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
Leave your love to yesterday
What more can your love do for me?
When will love be through with me?
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day that dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
(Fly away)
If You Could Read My Mind ~ Gordon Lightfoot
If you could read my mind love
What a tale my thoughts could tell
Just like an old time movie
’bout a ghost from a wishin’ well
In a castle dark or a fortress strong
With chains upon my feet
You know that ghost is me
And I will never be set free
As long as I’m a ghost that you can’t see
If I could read your mind love
What a tale your thoughts could tell
Just like a paperback novel
The kind that drugstores sell
When you reach the part where the heartaches come
The hero would be me
But heroes often fail
And you won’t read that book again
Because the ending’s just too hard to take
I’d walk away like a movie star
Who gets burned in a three way script
Enter number two
A movie queen to play the scene
Of bringing all the good things out in me
But for now love, let’s be real
* I never thought I could act this way *
And I’ve got to say that I just don’t get it
I don’t know where we went wrong
But the feelin’s gone
And I just can’t get it back
If you could read my mind love
What a tale my thoughts could tell
Just like an old time movie
’bout a ghost from a wishin’ well
In a castle dark or a fortress strong
With chains upon my feet
But stories always end
And if you read between the lines
You’ll know that I’m just tryin’ to understand
The feelin’s that you lack
I never thought I could feel this way
And I’ve got to say that I just don't get it
I don’t know where we went wrong
But the feelin’s gone
And I just can’t get it back
What a tale my thoughts could tell
Just like an old time movie
’bout a ghost from a wishin’ well
In a castle dark or a fortress strong
With chains upon my feet
You know that ghost is me
And I will never be set free
As long as I’m a ghost that you can’t see
If I could read your mind love
What a tale your thoughts could tell
Just like a paperback novel
The kind that drugstores sell
When you reach the part where the heartaches come
The hero would be me
But heroes often fail
And you won’t read that book again
Because the ending’s just too hard to take
I’d walk away like a movie star
Who gets burned in a three way script
Enter number two
A movie queen to play the scene
Of bringing all the good things out in me
But for now love, let’s be real
* I never thought I could act this way *
And I’ve got to say that I just don’t get it
I don’t know where we went wrong
But the feelin’s gone
And I just can’t get it back
If you could read my mind love
What a tale my thoughts could tell
Just like an old time movie
’bout a ghost from a wishin’ well
In a castle dark or a fortress strong
With chains upon my feet
But stories always end
And if you read between the lines
You’ll know that I’m just tryin’ to understand
The feelin’s that you lack
I never thought I could feel this way
And I’ve got to say that I just don't get it
I don’t know where we went wrong
But the feelin’s gone
And I just can’t get it back
Monday, December 01, 2003
I am at this stage in my mind where I feel as though I am a social pariah.
Know what ? Friends are not all that cracked up to be. It's like the whole world have this insane idea that everybody else needs friends. But friends can only travel with you until that certain point in your life. After that, you are on your own, babes.
I watched And The Band Played On last night. I've heard about the movie but well, yesterday was when I saw it in all its glory. I must admit it really was hard hitting. And I think that fame and fortune should not come into play when you are dealing with human lives. Like in the movie, Dr Gallo was more interested in seeking fame by being the one who discovered the virus. Even though the French doctors were much more consistent in trying to identify the causative agent in the new mysterious disease.
So anyway. It's World's AIDS Day. Time to remember that we are not all that mighty even with the advancement of Science and Technology. Something which is less than 0.2 microns big can cause huge social and financial burden.
Happy 22nd Birthday Elaine Chong !
My mother. You are the centre of my universe. I love you, even if you might not think I don't show it at times. I really love the times we spent together. Just the two of us, with the 5 "crazy" cats.
Know what ? Friends are not all that cracked up to be. It's like the whole world have this insane idea that everybody else needs friends. But friends can only travel with you until that certain point in your life. After that, you are on your own, babes.
I watched And The Band Played On last night. I've heard about the movie but well, yesterday was when I saw it in all its glory. I must admit it really was hard hitting. And I think that fame and fortune should not come into play when you are dealing with human lives. Like in the movie, Dr Gallo was more interested in seeking fame by being the one who discovered the virus. Even though the French doctors were much more consistent in trying to identify the causative agent in the new mysterious disease.
So anyway. It's World's AIDS Day. Time to remember that we are not all that mighty even with the advancement of Science and Technology. Something which is less than 0.2 microns big can cause huge social and financial burden.
Happy 22nd Birthday Elaine Chong !
My mother. You are the centre of my universe. I love you, even if you might not think I don't show it at times. I really love the times we spent together. Just the two of us, with the 5 "crazy" cats.