Not Sleepy Anymore

I can't get back to sleep. The room is hot. The bed is scratchy. My nose is semi blocked and my throat is parched. I'm thirsty like there is no way possible. I went to bed just after midnight and Dear continued to watch the second inning of his beloved cricket game.

Then I woke up at 3.33 am. With a start and realised that Dear is still watching the game. Suddenly, I just got pissed. And then sadness overcame me. Afterall, I did tell Dear to go ahead and continue watching the game. When I woke and he's not around, I just got peeved. Peeved that I stayed over and he's more interested in the game.

So I texted him to ask if he didn't know when to sleep. It took him a while to come in to the room to check on me. By which time, I was more than a little mad. I know, I'm the silly one. Trivial matters and all. Irrational behaviour and temper tantrums, galore !

And now.

I can't go back to sleep. Dear is snoring away happily and I'm up posting a "rant" at this ungodly hour. I would probably listen to another podcast if I really can't snooze soon. Or I might even while away my time playing either "Solitaire" or "Sudoko" on my mobile. Really, those are the kind of games good enough to make anyone snooze faster than you can say "monkeymansitsonthefenceandheckleanotherpasserbyagainandagainandagain".

Instant karma, anyone?

Rightful good scare !

Good Friday scare.

To make me think that I'm inept in my work and duties. That I'm old and forgetful. To think that my co-workers are all ignorant and unhelpful. That lady over at the Board. *tsks*

But the silver lining ?

The realisation that my head should not be too big for the doorway. There's efficiency and then, there's cockiness. Thankfully, I am not that big a cock ! :D

And so we will say goodbye

Time to say goodbye to the dude sitting behind me in the office. He's been transferred to another department. Effective date of move is November first. It's been announced just today. As usual, the move is made after a piece of hoo-ha.

The way the yahoos handle the shit on the face is to find a scapegoat. If you can't, just transfer the bugger to another department. It's effectively someone else's shit after that.

To the dude sitting behind me, I will miss throwing things (paper, mainly) behind. I will not be able to crash your table as I like anymore. I will not be able to lower your seat to the lowest possible level (to hide myself and trick you, of course !) and I will be not be able to just click my fingers to direct his attention to the counter.

Oh, yes, I will miss the dude sitting behind me. So many, many fond memories of good banters and fits of temper tantrums.

On the plus point, maybe I will ask the yahoos if I can get an extension of my extended work table.

Hah...

Ranting

Men !!! They make you so, so mad !!

Let it be known that I'm pretty mad with my Dear today.

*GRRRRRRRRR*

A Piece of Positivity

Okay, here's the deal. Without revealing too much information (in case I'm being spied upon and reported unfavourably to the boss), I've got some returns due to some diligence last week. A phone call and a request for confirmation of the info submitted, I may have taken a step closer to be out of the web. Happy ? You bet. Glad that it's not all futile ? Most definitely !

I hope I didn't jinx it too much by telling it now. I certainly hope they would get back to me, if I'm eligible.

The only issue I have right now is trying to recall, which one I'd submitted it for ! :-P

Crazy, sexy woman

That's me. Yeap. Even though the Dear thinks I'm one hell of a sexy woman, I still feel like that I'm not up to his standards. Not that he had ever stated any physical attributes his dream companion should have. Not that he dared to tell me to my face. Actually, come to think of that, he dared. Just that he didn't want to deal with my intense, massive mood changes. Hahaha ...

So anyways, as with all sane guys, they need a sane woman by their side. Without the added attachment of crazy mood swings. Which I will be the first one to admit that I come with. Major, loads and positively crazy mood swings.

Take for example, a couple of nights ago. Just before we turn in, we were talking about "the face that launched a thousand ships", Helen of Troy. And the actress who played her in one of the recent movies. I think I said that Helena was such a beautiful, Greek name and Dear agreed. Then I think I mentioned something along the lines that the depicted Helen in pictures or movies are not that pretty. According to the Dear, Diane Kruger, German actress was a classic beauty. And guess who was offended ?

So I just kept quiet and tried to sleep. Dear thought something was amiss when he spoke and I answered with just one word answers. I kept thinking that perhaps his mother was right. I am a bad choice for him. I have to support both parents (not rich), low education (the official records on my work website still indicates I have a Diploma but I got my Degree ages ago), of a different faith (she thinks if we have kids, I will poison their minds against his faith, which is like, "Say, what now?") and I'm not pretty enough (so I have flesh and wear glasses).

That maelstrom of feelings just got me so down that I was so pissed at myself for being so affected. So I cried. Not the wrenching soul tearing kind. Just the silent, tears running down the sides of my eyes kind. Stupid and crazy woman. Yeap. Me.

I refused to talk to Dear about the incident. He still bugs me these days to figure out what happened that night. Perhaps he will know when he reads this post. Perhaps it'll be too far in the past to revisit. Ah wells. Just an indication that women are a mad kind. But men still love us. Non-classic beauties and all.

P/S: For the record, I may not be rich but I'm not destitute either !